Mommy Manifesto Activity # 5
Mindfulness and Well-being: How am I taking care of myself?
Mindfulness is knowing what we are doing and why we are doing it. It is a call to pause, to reflect, and be present in the moment. The call to be mindful is now stronger than ever. As we juggle different roles and different tasks, there are moments when we wish we could multiply ourselves into two in order to be everything to everybody!
This is why it’s important for you to take care of yourself: body, mind, and spirit. Are they all one most of the time? Or do you find it hard to tune in to what you are doing because your mind is fleeting elsewhere and your spirit is clamoring something else.
As Dr. Honey Carandang, renowned psychologist, said, “We need to pay attention to parenting. To become an effective parent you must be mindful, conscious, and aware. It’s called mindful parenting. You must know what you’re doing, and why you’re doing it.”
Unfortunately, mothers are prone to rush, scramble, and fret over a multitude of matters. In effect, we get exhausted, frustrated, feel uncompensated, resulting in burnout! Yes, there is such a thing as Mommy Maxed Out!
The call for mindfulness is a call for the attainment of a sense of well-being.
Mothers need a healthy dose of self-care. Self-care is caring for your whole being: mind, body, and spirit. It may be regular home exercise or quiet time every morning. For some, it’s sipping a cup of tea while reading a good book. Self-care may also be taking a longer time to bathe and pampering your body. It may be staying an extra 30 minutes in bed in the morning or staying up late when the house is asleep.
Define the mode of self-care which works best for you. You know what interests and activities will impact you. You need not spend an inordinate amount of money on it. You just need to purposefully intend it to be your time, and you must be mindful of the experience and the feeling it brings you.
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Yes, moms need to be mindful of themselves.
I am a working woman and a mom of two. As a military, being mindful to oneself is very seldom realized and valued. A call of duty is on the top priority. Therefore, time management shall rule. In 24 hours, I have to allot 10 hours at work with maximum of 1 hour travel (back and forth) and at least 7 hours of sleep. I’m still left with 6 hours. What are my priorities to accomplish my remaining 6 hours?- I can still bond with my kids for 2 hours before they finally get to sleep; I can still watch TV for 2 hours while lifting dumbell; when kids are on snooze, I can read books or magazine or write my journal. Of course, my remaining 1 hour is to do some therapeutic exercise to relieve back and shoulder pain after the whole day of work, time for meditation or reflection and of course do my refreshing regimen before retiring at night.
On Saturdays, I have to wake up early to go for a jog when not on duty, take extra time to bathe and do movie marathon. The rest of the day is mine and of course on Sundays is a family and the Lord’s day. Weekends are the most precious. I can prepare and recharge my body, mind and spirit for the weeklong activities to be undertaken at work and at home.
I have been a full time mom for almost 2 years now. I thought being a stay at home mom will make me more relax and free from everyday work errands. I was wrong. Being a SAHM makes me feel exhausted though I admit I really enjoy being with my kids. But doing everyday house chores made me feel Mommy Maxed OUT! It was not easy doing multiple task like cleaning the house, cooking, washing the dishes, doing the laundry, plus teaching my preschool daughter. I felt that my 24 hours in a day is not enough to finish my job. Often times, I feel “Losyang” and easily get angry over small things. I lost my focus on which I need to accomplish. True enough that Mothers need to be pampered too so that we will be more effective mothers. Why not taking a nap while my daughter is asleep so I can cuddle her? Why not take an extra 10 minutes more than my usual 15 minute bath time? or jog in the morning with my kids to loose those extra pounds. Or just pause and pray to thank God for all the strength he had given me to make it through the day. I just need to purposefully intend it to be my time, and I must be mindful of the experience and the feeling it brings to me.